by Dr. Lawrence Wilson
© July 2022, LD Wilson Consultants, Inc.
All information in this article is for educational purposes only. It is not for the diagnosis, treatment, prescription or cure of any disease or health condition.
Definition of selfishness: An abnormal attachment to the physical/mental/emotional/etheric vehicle or self. This may sound rather esoteric, but it is the truth. We are really deeply spiritual beings, and selfish people do not recognize their connection with all other beings, and their oneness with God or the Universe.
For example, animals and even plants tend to be rather selfish, thinking mainly of their own survival. This is because they have forgotten or are not capable of realizing their deep connection with God or the One or the Universe, so they mainly think of themselves. Even animals, however, sometimes act unselfishly, but not usually.
THE BASIC RULES OF UNSELFISHNESS
Becoming unselfish is a very important step in human development, more important than most everything else. Done properly, it will bring you health, long life, happiness, joy, money, friends, love, and everything else you can possibly imagine, and even more than that. So this article will teach you how to do this step.
First, here are the two basic rules of unselfishness:
1. WHEN YOU WANT OTHERS TO BE HAPPIER MORE THAN YOU WANT TO BE HAPPIER, THAT IS UNSELFISHNESS.
A corollary is that you will not really be happy until all are happy. Therefore, help others to be happy, healthy and wise.
This means that we are all brothers and sisters, and there are no strangers, no “aliens”, no “enemies”, really, and no one but the “one mind of Christ”, then you will realize that selfishness makes no sense. It is like taking a knife and using your right hand to cut off your left hand, which makes no sense at all.
Unselfishness, however, is like healing the right hand using the left hand. It makes much more sense.
Selfishness is actually a spirit-level disease or spiritual disease, as compared to a physical ailment, or a mental/emotional problem. Therefore, selfishness must be approached on a spiritual level to heal it. This is a principle of healing all diseases. You must work on the level of the disease or a higher level, or it won’t work. This is the trouble with drug or vitamin therapy for selfishness, for example. It won’t work well at all.
To heal selfishness, one must practice the opposite. One can also question or doubt selfishness, and be open to its opposite. This makes it easier to act in the opposite way. One can also ask God or The One to take away one’s selfishness and teach one a lesson or two to learn unselfishness.
Be careful, however, because if you ask for help for selfishness, the lesson could seem harsh. Your partner might leave, or your money might go away, or something similar. This would force you to choose between selfishness and unselfishness, and this would be the lesson, if you can see it. But asking for help is very good and makes the lesson come quickly in most cases.
You can also read about selfishness and decide you just don’t like it any more. This is very helpful, in fact, so that you can recognize when it is creeping back into your life, for example. You may also want to read about great people who were not selfish, and who succeeded wonderfully in life. This can help you have a positive view of unselfishness.
You can also do the pushing down exercise, moving the energy forcefully downward as you do so. This will tend to bring up traumas that caused you to become selfish. It can have another effect, especially if you try to identify more with the downward-moving energy and less with your body. In this case, it may help you to detach from the physical body entirely, and this can help greatly with selfishness.
You can also do other things such as keep a gratitude journal of people and things you are so grateful for that you won’t be selfish any more. All of these methods can help overcome this affliction.
ENLIGHTENED SELFISHNESS OR JUST ENLIGHTENMENT
This is a purposely confusing term that can mean one of two things, or both.
1. I see that we are all connected, and since I want to be happy, I see that the only way I can be happy is to make you happier.
2. I see that in order to be unselfish, I must survive, so in that sense I must be a little selfish to make sure I eat, sleep, rest and care for myself, too. This is really something else, which is to include yourself in the circle of your love or caring. In this sense, it is not selfish, but rather just loving the self, as you love others.
This idea is echoed in the words of Rabbi Hillel (30 BC to 9 AD): "If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I?” Ethics of the Fathers, 1:14. Hillel is acknowledged by many Jewish people as being one of the wisest men who ever lived. Coincidentally, he lived roughly at the same time as Jesus.
Enlightened selfishness is a step on the road to selflessness. It is a safe step, and one that keeps one alive, and that is good most of the time. However, not all of the time. For other Bible passages indicate a different type of selfishness in which one “lays down one’s life for another”, so strong is one’s love. Also, other passages suggest leaving one’s friends, one’s family, one’s city to follow the Lord. Again this is another type of unselfishness or non-attachment to the physical/mental/emotional/etheric vehicle or body.
BUT I HAVE TO BE A LITTLE SELFISH
Many people will say, “But you have to be a little selfish or you get nothing in life.”. This is definitely not true if you do it right, which is to include yourself in the circle of your love. In other words, love the self.
The least among you are not the worst off, necessarily, and much of what people “get” from being selfish – bigger houses, more cars, more friends, etc. may not be that wonderful for them, although they would disagree. I would therefore say, you have a right to be selfish, but it does not make it right or good.
ISN’T CAPITALISM AND MODERN SOCIETY JUST SELFISH?
The answer is no. It is not selfish at all. It uses the selfish motivation of profit, and maybe power, to get people to work, but the outcome is not selfish at all.
If one wants to make money in a capitalist economy, one must satisfy the needs of others and take good care of one’s customers. This is an ironclad rule within the capitalist economic system.
The cynics would say, this is not true. The corporations create demand for their stupid, dangerous, toxic products with television ads and other ways, and they brainwash the people to believe they need more makeup, more cars, more houses, etc.
While this occurs to a degree, we would say that as long as the government does not force people to buy those cars, makeup and houses, the decision still rests with the individual, and it does not matter how hard a company or individual tries to influence a person. It cannot be done that much if the person does not want the product or service.
All diseases or conditions are either more yin or more yang. Yin here means watery, cooler, expanded, broken apart and centrifugal in nature. Yang means warmer, more contracted, and more centripetal in nature. These are physics qualities, but very important today, in our yin era.
Selfishness is a weak yang condition, which means that its solution is often of a yin nature. Doing or practicing unselfishness is a yin type of activity because it disturbs and disintegrates the ego self, to a degree. This is important to understand.
One can also conquer selfishness with knowledge and understanding, to a degree. This method is also a little yin. It works to a degree, but is not enough, by itself, to overcome selfishness completely. One must also change one’s behavior, not just one’s thinking.
SELFISHNESS IS ONE OF THE WORST SPIRIT-LEVEL DISEASES
This is so because selfishness cuts one off from the truth of life, which is that we are all related to each other and what befalls one member of humanity affects everyone.