FORGIVING YOUR IMPERFECT PARENTS

by Dr. Lawrence Wilson

© November 2016, L.D. Wilson Consultants, Inc. 

 

            Did you know that most of us, at some time or another, must let go of anger toward our parents and forgive them?  Most parents are not perfect, no matter how hard they try.  It is just very easy to make certain mistakes that I will discuss below.

            However, if you donŐt forgive your parents, you will be forever crippled and life will not work out well.  So begin today to forgive your parents for everything they did and for that which they did not do that they should have done.

 

WHAT DO PARENTS DO INCORRECTLY?

 

            These fall into two large categories.  The first are things they did that they should not have done.  The second category is failing to do what they should have done.

Examples of problems in the first category are:

 

1. Molest their children.

2. Rape their children.

3. Speak harshly.

4. Hit hard.

5. Spoil children.  For example, many parents allow children to stay up too late so they are tired much of the time.

6. Lie to children at all. (Most children can see through lies much better than adults believe they can.  A parent may get away with it once or twice, but children catch on and hate for it.)

7. Make promises they cannot or will not keep.

8. Drink alcohol and become violent, or just gross or disgusting.  They also become inattentive and accidents occur.

9. Smoke marijuana and become aberrant, absent and stoned.

10. Smoke cigarettes and filth up the air and their breath.

11. Dress inappropriately (or not at all) and cause embarrassment, shame, and confusion.

12. Other things that cause embarrassment to a child.  This can be being too critical of a child, spilling things on a child, not changing a diaper in a timely way, or other things.

13. Divorcing, especially for selfish reasons.  (Very few children understand why parents would divorce if they love their child.)

14. Acting inconsiderate, rude or impolite.

15. Speaking too loudly or yelling.  This is very bothersome for young children, but also for any child.

16.  This is just the start, but it gives an idea of the kind of things parents may fail to do.

 

THE SECOND CATEGORY - WHAT PARENTS OFTEN FAIL TO DO

 

1. They do not stop a rape or a molestation. 2. They fail to see when the child is having trouble with a bully, with drugs, with teen pregnancy, with school grades, or something else and they let things get out of control.

3. They do not discipline fairly, sanely and consistently.

4. They just do not care enough.

5. They do not understand the childŐs mind and thinking.

6. They do not respect a childŐs privacy, especially in the sexual area.

7. They allow a child to make bad mistakes in friendships, drugs, relationships, work, school or something else.

8. They do not insist on eating only nutritious food, so the child becomes ill.

9. They do not avoid vaccines, and most medical drugs and shots.  As a result, the child becomes poisoned and ill.

10. They do not insist that girls, particularly, cover up well when they go out.  They also allow girls to show off and put themselves in danger with boys in other ways.

11. They are not careful enough so their child has an accident or a fall.

12. They are so overprotective that the child feels smothered and never learns to be independent.

13. They do not answer a childŐs questions.

The above is just a partial list. 

 

FORGIVING PARENTS IS USUALLY MUCH HARDER THAN FORGIVING YOUR FRIENDS

 

            This is usually because we expect the most of our parents.  We are dependent upon them for life, and we naturally believe as children that they love us and know how to care for us.  Unfortunately, this is not always the case:

 

* Some parents are just young and inexperienced.

* Some parents are immature and more concerned with themselves than with caring for their children.

* Some parents are smarter than others when it comes to caring for children.

* Some parents had good parents themselves, so they know what to do.  Others did not have good parents, so they learned wrongly how to care for children, or they learned very little from their family.

 

However, you still must forgive your parents.  Reasons it is harder to forgive parents than others include:

1. One expects more of oneŐs parents than one does of oneŐs friends.

2. Parents are closer to you.

3. If a parent messes up, it might be your fault, or so most children think.

4. Other, such as that the traumas go deeper, in most cases.  In fact, many people focus on the problems of their friends because focusing on forgiving parents can mean opening up deep wounds from the past.  Please do it anyway. 

 

A COMPLETE NUTRITIONAL BALANCING PROGRAM WILL HELP YOU FORGIVE YOUR PARENTS

 

            This is an important point.  It may sound strange, but as you become stronger, mentally clear, and more focused and healthier using a complete nutritional balancing program based on a properly performed hair mineral analysis, forgiving everyone becomes easier. 

In fact, if you set your intention strongly to forgive your parents and follow a program, in most cases the forgiveness will begin to happen automatically.  You may go through phases of anger, depression, anxiety or irritability.  However, you will get through it easily, in most cases.  If you have difficulty, rub the feet more, do more coffee enemas, use the red heat lamp more, and do the pushing down exercise more.  In most cases, this will help you get past any blocks that arise.   Also, be patient and persistent.

Advantages of a nutritional balancing program is you do not need to know exactly what a parent did or did not do that was incorrect, and correction and forgiveness often begin to occur quickly – at times, within a few months.

To summarize:

1. Set your intention right now that you want to completely forgive your parents for everything they did wrong, and for all that they did not do.  This is a very important step.  Repeat it to yourself often, that you do not want to hold any resentment against your parents, no matter what happened.  You want to let it all go so you can move on in your life. 

2. Along with #1, care for your health and nutrition properly with a nutritional balancing diet and hopefully an entire program.

3. Be patient and persistent.  Forgiveness often takes a number of years because there can be layers of anger and resentment to undo.

 

To understand the topic of forgiveness much better, read Forgiveness on this website.

 

 

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