SEXUAL ISSUES

by Lawrence Wilson, MD

© 2008, The Center For Development

This is a huge topic. This article will mention only on a few items regarding sexuality that are specifically related to your health and spiritual development. For more information about child development and other related topics, see the parenting section of articles on this website.

WHAT IS SEX?

Is this obvious, or what? I would say, no. The modern school system does not teach this. Sex is more than exchanging body fluids. It has to do with understanding yin and yang, the polar opposites, and their interaction on this plane of existence.

I will put it more simply. On this plane, all creativity occurs by the joining of opposite forces. These include cold and warmth, as occurs with rain clouds when it rains. Hot and cold also give rise to chemical reactions. High and low pressure give rise to all winds that circulate the air, even in your house. And so it goes. This is sex at its most basic level.

Copulation among the species is just one tiny aspect of sexuality. It is a genetic mixing to assure the quality of the species.

As many know, some plants reproduce asexually, but all higher animals use sexual reproduction because it is better. If not, the idea would have died out millions of years ago. Thus, sexual desire is built into our genes to build a better race of people. This is Biology 101, as they say. However, it is seldom taught to our children, who desperately want and need to learn why sex exists at all.

Sex is just a body function, like having a bowel movement. And it is mediated and governed by sex hormones.

HORMONE MOTIVATION FOR LOVE

Young women need to know that boys and most men are much more hormonally driven than the women. This is hard to imagine, perhaps, but it is true. It is part of nature’s design to reproduce the species.

This is not bad or good. It is the design. Women, in particular, need to understand it because men generally do not. Men tend to think sex is about their good looks or their sexual “nature”. Women need to know it is mainly just hormones.

In practice, this means that when a man says he is in love, it is often lust and no more. It is not really about love, which young people have little idea about, except what they have read or seen on the television.

WHAT IS LOVE?

Without getting too deep, love is an attitude. It is not a feeling! It is a quality of the higher mind. The following may sound like a quote from the bible, but it is not far off.

Love is patient and love is kind and respectful. Love is never in a hurry for anything. Love is tolerant, soft, kind and gentle.

Read this description again if it sounds strange or unfamiliar, please. If your man or woman is not acting in this way, it is not love, pure and simple.

However, confusion arises because love is not about showering praise, hugs or anything else upon another person, animal or thing. Love is, once again, an attitude. And this attitude is a kind of friendship. I say a kind of friendship because most friends are just playmates, to be honest. They are people we stick with because they share a common interest with us such as bowling, work or even desire for sex.

Love is a special kind of friendship. It may be described as a desire for the best in another. A friend in this sense is a person whom I love so much that I will always aim for the highest in the other and bring attention to that which is not the highest. Few friends will actually do this for each other.

This gives rise to what is called “tough love”. This means what when one who is in love sees that another is not living up to their best, it will be pointed out. This is not always well-received, especially if the other is looking for all praise and hugs.

It also means that one cannot take advantage of the weaknesses or personal desires of another for personal gain.

This stance, called tough love, is delicate and easily misused. It can lead to resentment on the part of the other, and frequently is misused to harm another. “I am only hurting you for your own good”. It can even be used as a sexual tool of manipulation, as in “let’s have sex because I know you need it and want it”.

Yes, she wants it because she wants love and this is as close as she feels she can get to the real thing. But sex is not love, ever.

WHY NOT HORMONAL LOVE?

Why can’t the two be combined, you may ask? The reason is that they are completely different. There is little common ground. Hormones are chemicals that act on our bodies to produce feelings in the sexual organs, the brain and elsewhere. They are mechanical effects, basically. Love, in contrast, is an attitude, something else completely. It is a function of the higher thought processes.

Most people, especially young women, are confused on this point. They believe that if a man is attracted to them, he must love them at some level. This is not true. Read this again if you are not sure about it.

THE CULTURE WAR

Some conservatives talk about a culture war. It is a true concept. There is a battle between those who say we are just animals, who are hormonally driven. Since that is our nature, we may as well enjoy it, including as much sex as we want.

Others say we are human, not animal. This is the spiritual view. We are capable of love, which is not true of the animals. Animals can be kind and gentle at times, but usually only when happy and relaxed. People can look higher and think much more than any animal. This has implications for sexuality, to be sure. It means we are not to confuse our animal instincts with love.

COURTSHIP

This subject is mentioned because it is a lost art that has purpose, even in the animal world. Aimals court for different reasons, to be sure, but courtship is about getting to know one’s partner. Casual sex negates courtship. It is not even the rule in the animal world. It shows how low people have sunk.

The old idea of a lengthy courtship had a few problems, but was a much better system than the casual sex approach, for example. It provides two people time to get to know each other in different circumstances, hopefully, and to evaluate things far more rationally.

CASUAL OR RECREATIONAL SEX

This section will not thrill many women. I am sorry about this. I will suggest that if you don’t know the man you are sleeping with, ladies, you are stupid. This is harsh, but it has to do with realities that are not pleasant to talk about. These include sexually-transmitted diseases and more, including why you are here on earth.

Casual sex is based on the belief that men and women are basically animals, like dogs, cats, pigs and the others. They have sexual “needs” that must be met in some ways. If society does not allow them the normal means, they will misbehave anyway, so why not just sanction it. And since we are sanctioning it anyway, why not say it is cool, hip, and really new age. Here is why.

SACRED SEX

Is there is such a thing? I would say, there is a sacred side of sex. It is about:

· joining with another and producing healthful children.

· joining with another to build a truly spiritual society.

· joining with another in a selfless act.

· joining with another in a community of souls who are dedicated to living well.

· living a life of ease and safety.

Casual sex negates all of these. It is certainly not about producing children, which only occurs as an accident. Nor is it about building a better community or a more spiritual society. It is always selfish and since it almost always spreads disease, it is not about living well or safely.

Sacred sex is real and is quite simple. It occurs in committed relationships and occurs daily in the lives of many people. It does not require special knowledge of techniques, as some believe. These may enhance it, but are not needed. It is about joining with another in a close contact for purposes that are greater than each one individually. That is how I would define sacred sex.

THE SEXUAL ACT

The pop culture says that sex is fun and that is all there is to it. Women should be as irresponsible as men, many are taught, and just do it for the heck of it because one is bored, tired of talking, or silly with “love” which is really just animal desires for copulation.

Children are just a mechanical problem to be solved with pills, patches or mechanical devices inserted into the utereus. This is totally false, as most women know, at least subconsciously.

When sex is done just for fun, most women know intuitively they are being used. This may sound very harsh, as the women are often the ones today who initiate the sex. They do it with their clothing, or lack thereof. They do it with their hair styles, their mannerisms, their skin tones due to makeup and much more. Yet they are the victims in most cases. This is unfortunate and a huge problem in the education of women today.

Young women need to understand this well. They need not respond to pressure, either from men or boys, or from parents, or from society with its irresponsible moral values in many instances.

MARRIAGE AND SEX

The sexual act is so sacred it is forbidden outside of marriage in most cultures. There are good reasons for this. Let us examine a few of them:

1. Sex often transmits disease. This should be an obvious reason for monogamous sex, but we’ll mention it anyway.

2. Jealousy and rage around sexual desire causes murder every day. Marriage is a convenient way to avoid these problems, provided one stays within the boundaries of their marriage oaths.

3. Marriage causes stability in society. Sex tends to create sexual pecking order, with some on top, no pun intended.

4. Marriage provides a stable way to raise children. Sex without marriage causes many problems of unwanted and uncared for children.

There are other reasons for marriage, such as economic reasons. Single parent households are often less well off. Other reasons are for the protection of women, both legal and physical. And there are others. However, these are enough for now.

ATTITUDES ABOUT SEX AND CHILD-RAISING

A woman’s attitude will affect her unborn child more than she can imagine. If she is angry with her partner, it shows in the child’s auric or energy field. This affects the child for months or years.

If she is unhappy at the time of her sexual act, even this can affect the child as well. This is why many primitive cultures had marriage rituals to prepare a couple for sex. They may sound silly, but they can make a difference.

Also, after conception was confirmed, many older cultures would take the mother-to-be aside and teach her what to expect and how to behave so as to have a healthy child. This, too, would be wonderful for modern woman, who often does not have a clue as to what she should expect and the important effect her feelings and behavior have on the infant inside.

FATHERS

Here is another area of disgust, in my opinion. Many people assert today that fathers are unnecessary. They just get in the way, basically. The welfare state can support the poor women and children, while the fathers go drinking or whatever.

This attitude is more prevalent than one may imagine, especially among the socialist groups such as the Democrat party. Fathers are often blamed for all the problems of our society, with its “male dominance”, and so forth. So I will comment on this.

The father’s presence in the child’s life is important, though not as critical biologically. Men don’t breastfeed, in other words. However, they bring balance to life, just as women bring balance to men.

The male influence is most helpful, especially for girls, though this may seem unusual. It brings balance to them, even if the man is not the finest quality available.

SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASE

Most young people, and many of all ages, simply do not believe this is possible until it happens. They think they are somehow immune.

The truth is, it happens most of the time. It may not cause a sore, a rash or a pain. But it occurs for a simple reason. The tissues are in contact for a while and germs love this warm, moist area of women’s bodies, in particular. Men have fewer problems with it, because they are not warm and moist in this area. If they bath quickly they can remove a lot of the germs. Women cannot. Women must douche if they want any protection at all.

Douching. Most young women do not understand this vital health procedure. It is simple and quite fast, in fact. It needs to be done within an hour of having sex. Here is the procedure:

Sit facing into the bathtub. Fill an enema bag with water, using at least a quart or more. Fill the bag entirely if you are not sure how much to use.

Add at least one tablespoon of hydrogen peroxide from the drug store. Colloidal silver is even better – at least two tablespoons if you decide to use it instead. I do not recommend store-bought commercial douche formulas, which contain harmful chemicals in some cases.

Let all the water run into you and back out again. Do not stop and hold the water. Just let it run in gently and cleanse the entire vaginal area, inside and outside as well. Then dry the area and get dressed. That is all there is to it.

Do it each time you have sex, even if it is your husband, I would suggest. This is because there are infections in almost everyone and it is just a good idea.

This procedure was taught at one time, even in high school, to all young women, believe it or not. However, we have become a society of pigs, unfortunately, who do not attend to their cleanliness as they could.

If your man thinks it is silly, ugly or gross to behold, then just close the door and do it anyway. Do not be swayed by a man’s protests that he is clean. He doesn’t know in most cases, as the man rarely feels the germs on his skin. However, they are there in most instances.

PLANNED PARENTHOOD AND OTHER BIRTH CONTROL “CLINICS”

I worked at a Planned Parenthood location in Cincinnati as part of a medical residency. I was shocked how little warning was given to young girls and women about the dangers of the pill (and even worse, the birth control patch).

In fact, little was said about sexually transmitted disease. The pill was the drug of choice, so I suppose too much talk of STDs would have ruined the atmosphere. I asked why condoms were not the preferred option. I was told it was too much trouble and spoiled the fun.

I came away disillusioned and disgusted with these clinics and their attitudes. Let us review a few facts:

1) Pills, patches, and IUDs are not 100% safe. That is the fact.

2) Side effects of pills and patches, in particular, include birth defects, copper toxicity and a much greater risk of cancer, heart disease and strokes if the woman stays on them any length of time. One study reported that just having taken the pill increases the risk, even if one quit years ago.

3) STDs are real. These methods do nothing to protect against them.

4) Women think they are invulnerable with these devices. This is untrue and gives a false sense of sexual security, if one could call it that.

CONDOMS

As anyone knows who has played with condoms, they are thin and delicate. They often fall off during sex. They can fall on the floor and not be noticed until hours later. They can break and you would not know it, and just a small tear is all that is needed to negate their effect.

If they work, they are not near 100% effective because of the preceding problems. Most contain latex and lubricants that can cause infections by themselves.

Finally, they do nothing against emotional stress that having sex can cause, especially for sensitive women. So they are not a great option, though they do and can provide some protection for women, which is our main concern.

HAVING CHILDREN

Girls need to know that most boys don’t care about children nearly as much as girls do. This is biologically programmed and important to know. Boys are programmed to be more oriented toward business, politics, war and other societal events and activities. Girls take the lead in the home, the children, education and other activities. This is not simply cultural, although it is certainly influenced by culture. It is also biological, I would submit.

BIOLOGICAL RESPONSIBILITY

Girls are also more responsible, in general, than boys. This, too, is programmed biologically, I believe. And it is not a bad thing. Boys are programmed to be the aggressors, keeping the enemies at bay.

WHAT TO DO

Based on the above, here are suggestions, particularly for young women.

1. Know that sexual desire is not love. Love is about an attitude that is uniquely human. Hormones are something entirely different. They are not bad, but they are not love.

2. Say up front if you are interested sexually or otherwise. Then tell suitors that you will wait at least a year and then decide.

This alone will discourage the hormone-driven types. If not, you’ll find out soon enough, as they will be impatient. That is good, to find out who is who. Skip the silly bantering that goes on between those “in love” and declare your intentions, women, so you will get what you want and need.

3. Leave the hormone-driven types to their own kind. They carry diseases of which medical science is just learning about, like AIDS. You are far better without their attentions, even if it means home on Saturday night in front of the television or with a book.

4. Use a condom and douche after sex, if at all possible.

CONCLUSION

Today, things are so mixed up that some women are taking the lead in letting go of responsibility for children. Daycare is the answer, they say.

Fun is mainly what these women think about. Fun is too often defined as getting high, getting sexed and getting drunk. Or it can be defined as material advantage, shopping and so forth. These women are best avoided, men, if you want a happy home life.

This is occurring because hormones are far out of balance in most people. There are many reasons for this. Pesticides mimic estrogen, creating effeminate men. Many are homosexual for this reason, although I know it is taboo to suggest such a thing to some people. Nutrition is horrible, leading to nutrient deficiencies, metal toxicity and many more physical imbalances.

Many women are too sick or tired to raise a family and take responsibility for it. As a result, the state is the new nanny, and daycare the answer. I submit this is all sickness.

This article could go into far more detail, but the major points are made. Please read them carefully, especially the young at heart who are looking for love.

Please, parents, protect your children from the societal secular attitudes that will destroy them if you allow it. The girls have no protection in the public schools whatsoever, and indeed this is where they learn the false values as well and meet the hormone-driven boys who seem so tempting.

The home-schooling movement is growing for many reasons. This is but one of them, and is an important one. It is a way to control what your child hears, sees and is taught. Only this way will girls learn about having children at an early age. Then they can prepare their bodies and minds for the challenges and rewards it entails.

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